‘Be Humble’ Really Means Be Insecure
Exposing Truths Society Doesn’t Want You To Know
You’re not being humble if you know your worth. Others are supposed to say “you look good” but don’t you dare voice it. Others are supposed to acknowledge your value but tread carefully when expressing your value to others. But why is this the case? Simple! Because most people are insecure.
‘Be humble’ really means be insecure like us!
Those who know their worth, stand for something, and question what was taught are classified as an endangered species but I’m here to say,
I see you, I respect you, and I value you.
You don’t need mine or anyone else’s approval to believe in yourself and want to share that with the rest of us.
It’s Not About Us
I remember the moment my friend made our high school varsity basketball team and I didn’t even make the freshman team. Literally, all he said was, “Ayo I made the team” and was going on about how good of a try-out coaches said he had. He never rubbed it in my face. He was excited for his accomplishment and wanted to share the moment with me, his friend.
At the time, I felt like he was bragging because I was insecure about not making any team at all. So instead of congratulating, I told him to be humble. Disgusting. And I could go on with more personal instances or those of family, friends, and colleagues. Or perhaps the engagement from Linkedin post anytime someone wishes to share their accomplishments with others in their network.
Point is, most people feel as though someone else voicing their worth then makes them and their path less worthy. Or the act of celebrating oneself is often associated with bragging. But this couldn’t be further from the truth. We have to recognize the difference between someone simply acknowledging their self-worth versus devaluing the worth of others. Those who devalue the worth of others should be the only group told to be humble.
Fault Of The Unknown
The issue is no one really knows what humble means. According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary:
Humble (adj.) not proud or haughty: not arrogant or assertive. Note: “proud” and “haughty” contradict themselves. Again it’s okay to be pleased with yourself whilst not treating others as if they’re inferior.
Humble (verb) to destroy the power, independence, or prestige of
And if that doesn’t suffice, Google’s homepage definition isn’t any better:
Humble (adj.) having or showing a modest or low estimate of one’s own importance
Humble (verb) lower (someone) in dignity or importance
So you’re telling me this is how we want people to feel about their accomplishments? You basically want to destroy the credibility of their importance? Sounds insecure to me.
You should want to celebrate any milestones however you choose as long as you don’t devalue the worth of others. Imagine if everyone hid their accomplishments because of this ‘be humble’ culture. That would mean shutting off a form of inspiration.
As a creative writer, I love seeing what other writers have accomplished. That doesn’t mean my writing is all of a sudden less worthy. Or as a creative entrepreneur, I love seeing heights reached by other entrepreneurs. That doesn’t insinuate that I’m incapable of reaching such heights.
But that mindset begins with giving up the comparison game and focusing on what’s meant for you.
How To Be Confident And Own Your Worth
Rather than tell someone who simply wants to share their success to be humble, celebrate with them. But that’s difficult to do if insecurities aren’t catered to. It’s best to look inward first and water the roots so any external conditions simply complement your foundation.
Before we go any further, let’s first ask ourselves, “What is confidence?” Confidence has nothing to do with being ego-driven and chest-pounding in the face of society. But that you lack no uncertainty about your own abilities.
So how does one become this sure of themselves? How did I overcome the act of believing my friends owed me something anytime they shared an achievement with me? If you browse the web you’ll likely discover tons of advice on ways to boost your confidence. Tips such as become a fashion icon, hit the gym, change your body language and a bunch more not so helpful advice.
There’s a simple 3 step process you should consider as you choose to water the roots:
- Get to know yourself. The main objective here is to develop self-awareness. Monitor our stress, thoughts, emotions, and beliefs. Self-awareness encourages us to tap into vibrations which is simply communication between ourselves and the universe. As we confess that a certain external condition was the trigger, we can then look internally to discover why. Our emotions should serve as a guide for elements to be catered to. The secret is to acknowledge what we feel, accept how we feel, and seek solutions. And in order for this to be effective, we have to evaluate ourselves from an objective perspective. How can I improve and adjust? Once we adopt that mindset, we can flow into the next stage of growth.
- Improve habits. Next, you’ll want to note any discoverable elements you wish to improve upon. Make a list of potential habits you can implement in your daily life to progress in those areas. And create a daily routine to ensure you’re actually following through with actions. Each time you practice positive habits, you’ll be better prepared for your ideal outcome.
- Validate yourself. Seeking outside validation only distracts you from your purpose. It breeds a false sense of confidence because, without it, you’re nothing. Preparation is the secret to self-assurance. If I’ve been practicing a certain habit over a period of time, it will eventually become second nature. Thus, I’ll be able to accept that if I do “X”, I’m confident I’ll get a “Y” result because I’ve done this many times prior. And no this doesn’t mean that you overestimate the task at hand. But there should be no uncertainty in achieving your ideal outcome which will allow you to focus on performing.
Final Thoughts
As you develop confidence, you’re able to embrace your own value and thus, have empathy for the value of others. We were all created from energy and house gifts which make each of us unique. Continue to celebrate and share those gifts with the rest of us! And always remember:
Be Respectful
Don’t Devalue Others
Stop Comparing Yourself
It’s More Than Okay To Give Yourself Credit
